Kitsch*nsync

Chewie

2007-02-28T10:50:00.000-07:00

Chewie got his hair done like an . Now he looks a lot more like an than a puppy.

A Cutting

2007-02-05T11:32:00.000-07:00

T got his hair cut. He looks like a new man. He has grown his hair for so long I forgot what he looks like with short hair. We went to watch. It was a wonder to watch, his barber-lady (that's what he called her) was a fun vietnamese young lady. She had a great sense of humor and we were so shocked when she went right at it, just grabbed his hair and said, "here we go!". He is going to donate his locks to Locks of Love.

What a handsome lad!

Sin Constellation

2007-01-07T09:15:00.000-07:00

Here's the exercise for Elevation - The Sin Constellation
We are going to make what I call a “sin constellation”. The constellation is an exercise to remember how deeply every one of us has been affected by the Fall. The Fall is our story too and we all have been born into a world where everyone has a condition or problem called sin. As well, each of us struggle with a unique group of sins. The sins that you have in your life are different than my life.

Rules:
1. Don’t let anyone else see your list, until you get further instructions.
2. Read your list once a day. Pray over the list however you would like. Let the reality of it soak in. Write down what you think or feel when you read it or consider the list.
3. Bring it back next week.

Make Your Sin Constellation
When you recognize one that has ever been a part of your life in the past, list it on the outer parts of your page in lower case letters.
If it is a sin that still is part of your life list it in upper case letters near the center of the page. I actually have 45 sins listed on my list, 8 are in the center of my constellation.

Example:
vanity manipulation prejudice

MUSIC PIRACY
rudeness MATERIALISM CURSING arrogance
COMPLAINING BOASTING

name-calling jealousy adultery

Here's a list of some sin
Greed, gluttony, vanity, envy, lust, sloth, wrath, lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, pride of life, pride, materialism, jealousy, avarice, malice, prejudice, impatience, gossip, backbiting, manipulation, anger, meanness, belligerence, sarcasm, condescension, bitterness, belittling, bitchiness, teasing, name-calling, rudeness, controlling, bossyness, emasculation, revenge, tantrums, foolishness, abuse; physical, emotional or verbal, uncouth words, scoffing, scorn, unwholesome talk, cursing, sharp comments, stalking, dishonoring your parents, disobedience, rebellion to parents, disrespect to authority, arguing, fighting, arrogance, conceit, boasting, judgmental, offending, persecution, being a stumbling block, complaining, flattery, hate, holding a grudge, quarreling, tattle-tale, traitor, treachery, idolatry, workaholism, substance abuse, shopaholic, food as comfort, materialism, security in money, power hungry, overly competitive, gambling addiction, lying, masks, deceit, promise breaker, phoniness, covering up mistakes, showing off, posing, worried about what others think, not acknowledging wrongdoing, white lies, tax evasion, tax fraud, identity lies, bearing false witness, false accusations, unbelief, discord, corrupting innocence, vandalism, financial irresponsibility, divorce, lack of faith, fear, doubt, anxiety, worry, discontent, selfishness, self-promotion, selfish ambition, uncontrollable rage, life’s all about me, thinking you’re a god or goddess, laziness, murder, plotting someone’s demise, conspiracy, bribery, eavesdropping, busybody, lack of compassion, causing hurt, not serving, not responding to the HS direction, hardheartedness, condemnation, immorality, sensuality, sexual perversion, promiscuity, abortion, paying for an abortion, seduction, pornography, using sex as power, withholding sex for payback, frigidity, adultery, prostitution, voyeurism, extra or premarital sexual behavior, carousing, exhibitionism, homosexuality, sodomy, provocative clothing, entertaining lustful thoughts, transvestism, sexual abuse, rape, incest, lack of self-control, sorcery, drunkenness, stealing, shoplifting, swindling, music piracy, video piracy, embezzling, coveting, extortion, bullying, hazing, favoritism, evil, channeling spirits, witchcraft, occult, demonic activity, graven images, taking the name of God in vain, not keeping the Sabbath day, denying Christ, blasphemy, lack of forgiveness, strife, lukewarm living, kidnapping, just to name a few

Liminality

2006-10-27T09:08:00.000-06:00

There is a term I have read recently in two different books. It is the term liminality. It means a period of transition between two different places where someone or something is in neither one place nor in the other.

I really identify with this concept. Personally I feel like I am between two worlds and neither of them fit me. I feel clumsy here in this world, as though I am blind and am fumbling my way through life. I am without the information I need, the tools to live well or a guide to take my hand. I feel/know I am made for a different world than here, or if it is here, it's not for like it is.

I do have some handles, but they seem to be of either one of the other worlds of which I am stuck between, so it is difficult to gather a strong semblance of comfort or workability. Possibly I may not be meant to be able to make this work or be comfortable here, but maintain a longing for life in a different world.

So liminality really describes the place I find myself. I am here on this world longing for my true home, which some describe as heaven. I like to call it home. I just know I am made for a different world and living in this world requires that I somehow connect with Jesus to guide me through each day.

First Snow

2006-10-17T19:24:00.000-06:00

Our first snow of the season today! Winter has come in so quickly. Here's Chewie playing around. He just loves the stuff.

This Fall

2006-10-09T12:25:00.000-06:00

This Fall seems to be a crazy season. I've got so much going on with my work everything seems to be going great, yet it is a season where I am still trying to find out who I am and how I tick and how I relate and how I lead and stuff like that. In many ways I feel like a stanger in a strange land.

Argentine Pass

2006-09-07T21:58:00.000-06:00

Chewy and I went for a 4x4 excursion today up Argentine Pass. I took the day off to air out my brain and to take a little time to see if I could connect with God some. It was a great day and very good experience. I did take time to journal and listen, no big spectacular moments, but it was good to just listen. A very good day. Pictures are of the Pooper on the pass, Chewy with Grays and Torreys Peaks behind him and a couple of goats that were at the pass also.

New Addition

2006-09-03T14:45:00.000-06:00

Here's our new addition. We're not sure why we did this but we did. So far he is a great little guy.

passionless

2006-08-22T15:38:00.000-06:00

I am trying to think what there is in my life that brings about passion in me. I am in a season where passion seems to be a precious commodity - coming less than I want. I just know that right now everything is ok, but I am somewhat passionless. I know I work better when something is burning in me.

Beginning of the End of Summer

2006-08-06T09:49:00.000-06:00

We had a great time with some friends over at the house for a beginning of the end of summer party. We played some very exciting volleyball in the rain (it was miraculous watching the ball remain in the air with all of us inept players, what a blast! We played some Texas hold'em and watch Aust have the most amazing streak of luck imaginable. It was so much fun.

Family Reunion

2006-07-11T11:42:00.000-06:00

Blessed are the physically repulsive,
Blessed are those who smell bad,
The twisted, misshapen, deformed,
The too big, too little, too loud,
The bald, the fat, and the old-
For they are all riotously celebrated in the party of Jesus.
-Dallas Willard

I just finished a week of family reunion. I love them all.
Praise to our God and Father Jesus Christ!

Summer '06

2006-06-29T13:59:00.000-06:00

The events from the past couple of weeks include; my son getting lost in the woods during a hike with the family on Father's Day (we found him all is good), a significant bike accident (fortunately only road rash, lots of it), a wonderful wedding experience in Oysterville, Washington, a biopsy, restructuring of my job and the anticipation of my family coming to visit. Life just seems to come at you with so much. I am glad that everything isn't as hard as a concrete bikepath!

Wildlife near my Home

2006-06-05T13:13:00.000-06:00

I have been blessed to have open space near my home that is abundant with wildlife. This weekend I saw animals that I did not expect, bull elk and whitetail deer. We abundantly see mule deer here, but it was cool to see whitetail. As for the elk, periodically they come down from the mountains in the winter, but these guys seem to be here for the summer. They have beautiful velvet as their antlers are growing for the summer. I love this! I have also included a photo of a great blue heron.

wisdom

2006-05-24T08:00:00.000-06:00

Right now I feel like I need some wisdom because my brain is not big enough to come up with the solution to figuring out how I need to move in the future. So if you can, please pray that I can recieve some wisdom from God. Thanks

Beauty

2006-05-08T13:23:00.000-06:00

Beauty is not only a terrible thing,
It is also a mysterious thing
There God and the devil strive for mastery,
And the battleground is the hearts of men.
-Dostoevsky

Thus my own struggle is partially defined.

What you lookin at?

2006-04-13T13:56:00.000-06:00

This guy was outside my office window.

A Blessing Poem

2006-04-05T14:23:00.000-06:00

The Blessing
May you who are restless
Find rest
And in rest, restoration
And the healing
Of your hollow soul
May peace be yours
May you who are frozen
Find freedom
And in freedom the faith
To face the fire
And the thawing
Of your ice-gripped heart
May peace be yours
May you who are conflicted
Find convergence
And in convergence
Confidence
To be the one new child
Of your old divided self
May peace be yours
May you who live in tension
Find tenderness
And in tenderness the tendency
To kindness
And the creativity
Of a caring character
May peace be yours
And you who are Godless
May you find God
And in God,
The grace and growth you need
For fruit and fullness
And the love that will last you
Through the long-haul
Of a lived-for-others life
May peace be yours

By Bless
http://www.bless.typepad.com/spoken_worship/

What to Do?

2006-03-22T07:58:00.000-07:00

So often there are times in life when you don't know what to do because you have conflicting messages coming your way. For instance this sign is by my church. At first glance you think it is a negative message because of the 'no left turn' sign below and so almost everyone wanting to take a right turn sits at the red light while a huge line forms. They are paralyzed by the sign which intends to let you know it's OK to take a right turn on red. During the holiday season they put up a temporary flashing lighted sign which says "Right turn on Red OK". People stop and still make a traffic jam because there is a mall nearby.
That is just like the concept of the law. Even when it is trying to be positive it is negative. It just does not release you to live freely. Grace on the other hand, seems to do much better at setting you free. I know in my own life there are many times when I feel restrained from action because something is nagging at me not to move because I might just screw up or be unacceptable if I blow it. That's not the way of grace. I'd like to live in the way of grace more fully.

Road Home

2006-03-12T11:41:00.000-07:00

Here's the sight I get everytime I head home. It is awesome to see the mountains and be reminded of the glorious place I live. This is one way that God reminds me of good stuff every day.

People in the Storm

2006-03-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

Here is an exerpt from an essay by Frederica Mathewes-Green called "Loving the Storm-Drenched". She speaks of the cultural tensions that seem to exist between the media and the church and the posture that the church seems to take as one being attacked by what seems to be a conspiracy against the church and her morals standards. I love how she challenges our posture to culture. To read the entire essay go to www.frederica.com, click on the article.

"God has not called us to change the weather. Our primary task as believers,and our best hope for lasting success, is to care for individuals caught up in the pounding storm. They are trying to make sense of their lives with inadequate resources, confused and misled by the Evil One, and unable to tell their left hand from their right (Jonah 4:11). They are not a united force; they are not even in solidarity with each other, apart from the unhappy solidarity of being molded by the same junk-food entertainment. They are sheep without a shepherd, harassed and helpless (Matt. 9:36). Only from a spot of grounded safety can anyone discern what to approve and what to reject in the common culture.

But we must regretfully acknowledge that we too are shaped by the weather in ways we do not realize. Most worryingly, it has induced us to think that the public square is real life. We are preoccupied with that external world, when our Lord's warnings have much more to do with our intimate personal lives, down to the level of our thoughts.

So, when Christians gather, there's less talk about humility, patience, and the struggle against sin. Instead, there's near-obsessive emphasis on the need for a silver-bullet media product that will magically open the nation to faith in Jesus Christ."

May we love the people around us well.

Laughing

2006-03-02T13:10:00.000-07:00

So I saw a post from Mattie g. He said he had fun laughing the other night and that he needs to laugh more. So I responded to him with this;

- o laughter, what a concept. Man there is something so pure life about laughing. I laughed so hard the other day with my kids, Kris p., nick and kelly. my gut was busting. They were talking about celebrity jeopardy, the category of "the pen is mightier" just about killed me! -

I need to laugh more like I need to pray more, maybe even more than that. This is how my kids are such a gift to me. If I am with them for just a little while, we begin doing something that is funny; The boys a little more than han, but han brings an eye for beauty into everything, which is just as good as laughter. So maybe I need to post about that. Beauty and laughter, what a life!

New Stuff?

2006-02-15T09:19:00.000-07:00

I was thinking that I needed to add something new to this here blog and I was stumped. It seesm that there are seasons where you aren't very inspired and life is just going along. That must be where I'm at. Just cruising along. I did have a great Valentines' day.

A couple of Pictures from Kauai

2006-02-06T09:31:00.000-07:00

From Les Mis

2006-02-02T08:12:00.000-07:00

Here's a quote from Les Miserables that my daughter placed on her blog. Victor H. seems to really capture some of the things I was thinking and feeling about how God moves on us, even speaking to us non-verbally.
It seemed to be a sort of rite with him, to prepare himself for slumber by meditation in the presence of the grand spectacles of the nocturnal heavens. Sometimes, if the two old women were not asleep, they heard him pacing slowly along the walks at a very advanced hour of the night. He was there alone, communing with himself, peaceful, adoring, comparing the serenity of his heart with the serenity of the ether, moved amid the darkness by the visible splendor of the constellations and the invisible splendor of God, opening his heart to the thoughts which fall from the Unknown. At such moments, while he offered his heart at the hour when nocturnal flowers offer their perfume, illuminated like a lamp amid the starry night, as he poured himself out in ecstasy in the midst of the universal radiance of creation, he could not have told himself, probably, what was passing in his spirit; he felt something take its flight from him, and something descend into him. Mysterious exchange of the abysses of the soul with the abysses of the universe!
He thought of the grandeur and presence of God; of the future eternity, that strange mystery; of the eternity past, a mystery still more strange; of all the infinities, which pierced their way into all his senses, beneath his eyes; and, without seeking to comprehend the incomprehensible, he gazed upon it. He did not study God; he was dazzled by him. He considered those magnificent conjunctions of atoms, which communicate aspects to matter, reveal forces by verifying them, create individualities in unity, proportions in extent, the innumerable in the infinite, and, through light, produce beauty. These conjunctions are formed and dissolved incessantly; hence life and death

Non-verbals II

2006-01-31T10:35:00.000-07:00

So the concept of how God speaks to us non-verbally is on my mind and some others so here's a previous post to read.

I was just wondering the other day that if upwards of 75% of human communication is non-verbal, what does that mean for our prayer life. I would imagine that since we're created in the image of God maybe that's true of Him too. So maybe as we interact with regular daily life we non-verbally pray. Maybe much more oftener than we realize. For instance if we really do the "be still" thing, we actually speak volumes to God in a prayer of trust and such.

Anyway, I really pondered this on my vacation. It seems that my responses really reveal to me what God may be trying to communicate to me when he speaks without words. When you're driving along and out of the corner of your eye, you see a rainbow in a canyon something speaks to you into your soul (that's this picture). My breath expands and I am in awe and something me hesitates and I know that life is really special and there is so much to it. It's the word transcendent, something is so much beyond me, something/someone so creative and beautiful and out there that all parts of me just seem to stop and go awwwwwe. The non-verbals speak to me deeply, but without words. I think it is God saying this is who I am, this is my art, this is my soul and I want to share it with you. Even since I've gotten back I have seen cool stuff that does this, its just that Kauai is condensed glory

Just for Dan

2006-01-29T11:39:00.000-07:00

Alright I finally got some stuff downloaded from Hawaii. This photo is of the Na Pali coast overlooking Kalalau beach. This was the highlight of our trip, we were able to ride a helicopter around the island of Kauai. It was breathtaking, there were times when I really felt physically overwhelmed by the extravagance of this place. It was so gorgeous. It was so much non-verbal communication from the creator of the whole place. Our trip was just incredible. I really did not want to come back.

Vacation

2006-01-23T16:17:00.000-07:00

Just got back from Kaua'i. I'll post some pics when I get them downloaded.

Moving Out

2006-01-11T14:08:00.000-07:00

It seems like here in the USA it has become a faith that is secluded and turned inward, as though the church was meant to exist for the good of the people on the inside. I think Jesus had a different idea for his church. He meant us to be a blessing to all people, to take his life out to everyone. I'm not talking about evangelizing the world, I think Jesus would be ecstatic if we just loved people well. So, if you call yourself a follower of Jesus, consider being expansive and love the people around you!

Now for something really amazing

2006-01-04T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am looking forward to seeing new things this year. I am anticipating viewing new mysteries and exploring new things. I hope that I am able to slow down a little and begin to enjoy some of the 'first things' a little more intentionally.

'Twas a Good Year

2005-12-22T15:37:00.000-07:00

This was a very good year for me. Even though it went by so very quickly, faster than any other year I can remember. Yes, I know it gets faster when your going downhill! However, as speedy as it was it was a great year for relationships, a good year for personal growth, a good year to feel very blessed, a good year for some very fun excursions (Oregon, Boston, Atlantic Canada, Tetons), a good year for learning; it was just a good year. What an adventure! I am really looking forward to what next year brings.

Christmas

2005-12-19T08:27:00.000-07:00

Here's a bah humbug post. There has been so much going on when it comes to conversations about Christmas in the papers, on the radio and such. There is the "war on Christmas" that many Christians are fretting over because it looks as though secularists are seeking to take away the freedom of people of faith to express the most sacred aspects of their faith in public. Well, Christmas is not a sacred aspect of the christian faith. To be sure, the fact that Christ was sent into our world as Emmanuel, "God with us" is of prime importance, but the celebration of Christmas and all of its trappings doesn't seem to celebrate that at all. Even if it did, have we been given a mandate as followers of Jesus to celebrate his birth? The only mandate I remember is to remember. To remember his body and blood given for us so we could have a relationship with God. We are to remember whenever we eat and drink until he comes back.
Chistmas is fun and has a great intent, but I'm not willing to go into battle to defend my right to have a nativity scene or to say merry Christmas in public. I imagine that the real battle needs to be fought on a different level, that is, am I willing to love people and to listen to them and care for them with no strings attached?

A little color

2005-12-12T10:14:00.000-07:00

It seems that I'm in a rut recently. I just feel rushed, like there is too much to do or that there are too many demands. I know that I have been challeged to relax more and do what I can, but without allowing the busyness of life to overwhelm my sense of contentment and blessing. Right now life is good. I need to be reminded of this often because I so easily forget and get in that rut.

Hospital Visit

2005-11-30T15:27:00.000-07:00

I was at a hospital today to visit and pray with Aaron who was going into surgery for shoulder reconstruction. He seemed to be very brave, but he will be going through a very tough time of recovery. Today I also talked with another friend who will be undergoing surgery in December to deal with some cancer that is in her body. Have you ever experienced being with people in the hospital? They seem to be the most genuine and responsive at that time. The interesting thing is that you really can't do anything for them, except just be there, chat a little and offer up a prayer. It doesn't seem like much but it seems to be significant. There seems to be significance to just being a present human, and not trying to fix stuff.

Thanksgiving

2005-11-23T14:37:00.000-07:00

Thanksgiving is here! I love this, not just because of the opportunity to gormandize, but because of a great reminder to be thankful. I always think it is kind of corny when we go around in a circle as a family and say things we're thankful for, but we do it anyway and I like it. I like taking a moment and being thankful to the creator and sustainer of the universe for all the good gifts I have. My life is good, and I am even starting to have an attitude that is good even when circumstances are not all in order. I need to be reminded that I am not the sustainer of my universe, it's not my job. So, that leaves me to relax and enjoy my life, and to be thankful for the wonderful people in my life, the great things I see and hear every day and the way God is continually changing me to be like Jesus. I am a thankful man!

New Babies

2005-11-20T12:14:00.000-07:00

This is just a fun announcement as I am really starting to enter a new phase of my life. The next generation is now starting to have kids. Two of my nieces have just had babies. Let me introduce Milan and Taylor. This seems kind of freaky because I know that this is now the beginning of the Grandparent or Patriarch stage. I think I might be ready.

Expansive

2005-11-08T09:42:00.000-07:00

I was in dialogue with a friend this past week and he used a word like expansive to describe the Christian faith. That seemed intriguing to me because it seems like here in the USA it has become a faith that is secluded and turned inward, as though the church was meant to exist for the good of the people on the inside. I think Jesus had a different idea for his church. He meant us to be a blessing to all people, to take his life out to everyone. I'm not talking about evangelizing the world, I think Jesus would be ecstatic if we just loved people well. So, if you call yourself a follower of Jesus, consider being expansive and love the people around you!

Above-Average?

2005-11-02T09:50:00.000-07:00

My family likes to watch the Amazing Race because we like geography and cultures and stuff. We're watching it last night and one of the girls in one of the competing families said, "we're Christians, we're above average!". This created a visceral response in us, did you here that?! I think the sense of arrogance was what caused the response in us. Mostly I think it was the way that the view of Christianity that allows people to think tht they are better than other people is very disturbing. This way of thinking is in opposition to what Jesus taught. This "posture" of being better or above others is a wretched, perverted and warped view of Jesus' teaching and challenges to live. Jesus challenges his followers to be servants and give our lives up for others. When did Christians start to adopt this posture of arrogance? No wonder people of our world are often repulsed by people claining to be followers of Jesus. Incedentally, the family that was eliminated really showed grace, patience and humility. They didn't mention anything about their faith, but they seemed to be 100% more like Jesus than the family that claimed Jesus. Hmmm

Non-verbals

2005-10-25T15:35:00.000-06:00

I was just wondering the other day that if upwards of 75% of human communication is non-verbal, what does that mean for our prayer life. I would imagine that since we're created in the image of God maybe that's true of Him too. So maybe as we interact with regular daily life we non-verbally pray. Maybe much more oftener than we realize. For instance if we really do the "be still" thing, we actually speak volumes to God in a prayer of trust and such.

Authenticity

2005-10-24T09:12:00.000-06:00

I was wondering why it is such a difficult struggle for some people to be authentic or real. Is it a cultural thing for Americans? Or do just certain personalities struggle with letting people see the real person behind the mask? I know a lot of people who live their lives open and vulnerable and without a mask. It doesn't seem to be a thing of faith, on the contrary it seems that if you're involved with a church, you probably wear a more significant mask. I know I do at times and I don't like it. Anyway, I am part of a community of faith that is exploring being real, being human and being authentic. Pray for us so we can lower our masks.

A Happy Ending

2005-10-19T13:43:00.000-06:00

I was part of a search and rescue group yesterday. A hunter was lost and 20 guys from my church went out to help the search and rescue team find him. We were doing what they call a grid search, it was kind of weird because it felt like we were looking for a body. It was his fourth day out/three 28 degree nights and they were beginning to think he had been severely injured. But then at 2pm we got the message that the helecopter found him. It was a good day.

Rest

2005-10-17T07:57:00.000-06:00

I know I'm on this rest kick, but it seems that I need more of that than the drive to get stuff done lately. It seems backward in our efficient busy culture. I am at a place where I want to enjoy things more, laugh more, be stressed less, have time for people more, listen more, be restful or relaxed more. For me that requires that I have space for rest in my life. I'd like nothing more than just "be" for a while. That does seem backward because almost every voice around me says "do".

Life

2005-10-13T12:32:00.000-06:00

What gives you a real sense of life? What makes life worth living? It seems that life is filled with a whole lot of doldrum or boring stuff and then all the sudden there is a flash of life! I want to know what it is so I can see it and experience it more often. I know that seeing things that are beautiful and wondrous gives me something that feels like life. Being surprised by someone's unexpected act of kindness does too. A good laugh is in this category also. Feeling really close to someone special is one of these things. Something in me wants to live in these things oftener.

Sara is off to Samoa

2005-10-10T11:29:00.000-06:00

I had the privilege of sending off another friend this weekend. Sara is going off to the Peace Corps for two years. She'll be teaching and generally blessing the Samoan people with her presence. She made the decision to go because she wanted to be used by God to bless people in the name of Jesus. I'm quite certain she'll do that well. Sara's a good friend and will be missed. I'll be praying for her often.

winter is here today

2005-10-10T11:20:00.000-06:00

This is Colorado! Summer, Fall for a day and now Winter! This is a shot of the view out my window. Doesn't it just make you want to go out and roll around?!

Heater

2005-10-06T08:12:00.000-06:00

I was really tempted to turn on my heater as I commuted this morning. It's starting to feel really chilly and I love it! Its refreshing and invigorating to me. In my quest to discover simplicity, I think I will place cool Autumn mornings as one of the simple pleasures of my life.

Sabbath

2005-10-03T07:27:00.000-06:00

I was able to go for a short trip into the mountains this past weekend with My daughter Hannah. It was wonderful. We saw the beautiful aspen trees that are bright and beautiful, a spectacular sunrise and many wild animals (elk, deer, squirrels). I think it was truly a sabbath experience; it was restful, we enjoyed the glory of God's creation and we had exceptional time to build our relationship. I think that God was kind of brilliant when he expressed his desire that we take time out for Sabbath, to rest and experience his glory. I wish I could say I am purposeful and do this more often, but I can't. For me, days of Sabbath are too far and too few.

Contented

2005-09-28T11:35:00.000-06:00

For some reason I feel rather content. It feels good and I think maybe someone is praying for me. I like it. Sometimes it is like you lose your focus or center and so it is like going through your day like you have a flat tire or bent handlebars. But today it is as though an unseen force has intruded my life to make things ok. I know what/who the force is, but not too sure how it works. The interesting thing is that I don't feel like I made anything happen. That's why I think someone is praying for me.

Anxiety

2005-09-26T15:02:00.000-06:00

Do you ever feel like there is so much you're responsible for and nothing you can do to make a difference? That's kind of what I'm feeling. I seem to have so much to do and I have a hard time relaxing. It seems like I can't get it right. I would love to be able to rest and trust that what I have to give is enough for right now. Jesus talked about how the sparrows and flowers don't toil, but life is provided for them. Something about a restful life sounds good right now.

wrestling

2005-09-17T09:31:00.000-06:00

In a quest to find simplicity in my life, and even being able to discover the few things that I really can know, I am coming to the point where I am thinking that a life of following Jesus is a life of wrestling, and that with only two things. First, am I really going to live as thought Jesus is the only true source of life? (or am I going to contually pursue counterfeits that fool me to believing life is found in them? I've got my counterfeits, you have yours.) Second, am I really going to become a person whose life is defined by love? (That is, as Jesus defines it, giving up my life for others.)That's it. I don't think there is much else. I hope I struggle well in this life.

Worship Sells

2005-09-08T14:01:00.000-06:00

It seems as though people in the marketing profession are really the most spiritually sensitive people in our culture. They know what we think brings us life. And so they dangle that "life-giving" thing in front of us, "If you have this you'll be a real/wonderful/strong/whole person" or "get this thingy and your life will be fun/exciting/meaningful/beautiful". And so most of us go with it because we've been trained to consume with out much thought. I think it because we worship without much thought. I'd call it worship because I think humans are designed to seek life and awe and meaning. If we don't take time to consider what we believe gives us life and then turn our affections toward something that really sucks out life rather than gives life, we become idolaters... and the marketers smile. What do you believe brings you life? Photo by www.neave.com

The Fall

2005-09-08T12:18:00.000-06:00

I like the Fall. I love the coolness and the way that it makes me feel. It's not that I'm looking forward to the winter, that's not it. I just like the way it is today.

Missional Community Shift

2005-08-31T08:43:00.000-06:00

We are starting to make a shift in my community of faith. We have been really good, too good, at having really effective programs. The assumption is that we would attract people of all kinds to our place. This is a model that we have inherited and were doing without much thinking, kind of a default mode. So the conversation bagan as we assessed what was going on. We were attracting people, but they were all people transfering over from other churches, either because they were disgruntled consumers or relocating from another part of the country.
So our shift is from worrying about being "attractional" and having good programs, which has resulted in many people beoming disgruntled and becoming a transfer to a different church. We are starting to explore what it will take to become a "missional community". To me this means that we will challeneged to take the life of Jesus out to people around us. Rather than expecting them to come to us. I think it is a very profound shift. We'll see where this takes us.

Community

2005-08-28T10:22:00.000-06:00

This morning I went out to see the Balloon Festival that was in the State park next to my home. I walked over there got some photos and marveled at how simple the concept of hot air rising and slight morning wind currents could fill me with so much intringue. It was cool. It was also interesting to me how this was our community's own little festival. We live in a place that is pure suburbia, we don't have any summer festival with a carnival, watermelon eating contests and a parade. Where I grew up we had the annual Huckleberry Festival, no kidding! We don't have much of a sense for this is our town. We don't have a main street, just random streets everywhere with no center. I really think something is missing. I think we were created with a desire, longing and need to have a connected larger community. Suburbs were made without this design inside humans in mind. Possibly it was intentionally left out. Until next year, I think I will do what I can to meet more neighbors, and to plan to do something at the Balloon Festival that is intentional about community.

Snake

2005-08-23T14:34:00.000-06:00

My son and I saw this snake on an outing this past weekend. It was fired up that we were near and eventually it slid off into the grass.

Adios Friends

2005-08-22T07:24:00.000-06:00

Saying goodbye is never easy. And it always feels clumsy to me. But I get through it. As they move to a different part of the country a part of me goes with them and it feels like grief. Its such a mixed blessing, it is so good that you can have relationships that are deep enough to really hurt when you finally part, but it does hurt. I think the richness that good relationships bring to your life is very worth the eventual pain that comes with separation. I would imagine that the pain is even part of the richness, that part of life that is full and makes you breathe a sigh that says, "Life is good".
Matt and Adrienne have been a blessing from God and my life has been enriched by them. And I will miss them, for now.

Prayer

2005-08-17T09:41:00.000-06:00

I really like being near to God, so I pray at times. Prayer sometimes seems strange to me. To me it is a very personal exercise of faith, yet often I'm required or called to lead prayer in a group. In that regard its like two worlds of prayer, personal and intimate and then also out in the open and exposed. I've always struggled with praying with people; most difficult is with my wife and family. I feel this pressure to pray with them as a "spiritual" leader, yet its really tough to make a habit of it. Anyway, I like the fruit of praying, being nearer to God, seeing answers to my prayers, really great things, but I still struggle with just doing it. I like being challenged to pray more. We have this thing (pictured) at our worship gathering called a "prayer vase". People write out their prayers and drop them in. We pray for them during the week. I like this. It helps me pray more often.

The Boys

2005-08-16T13:17:00.000-06:00

Here's the boys in the creek. They hopped into it and started to build a dam as soon as we arrived. They changed the course of the flow.

Some of us dad's took them out for an overnight adventure. We wanted to impart some of our vast expanse of knowledge into their lives and so we took a little time out to do so. It was fun and I think a little wisdom was downloaded. I think we wanted to do this because we're sort of afraid.

Is it OK for a dad to be afraid for his son? To be worried that he'll make some of the same mistakes you made? I think that is what motivated our trip. We want them to know our passion for them to live well... and also to change the course of the flow.

Options

2005-08-15T10:41:00.000-06:00

A question has come to mind. First, let me give you some context. I am part of a team that has a strong desire to build a community of faith of people of our emerging culture. We have developed a simple vision and mission which reflects the simplicity of what Jesus has called us to be and do; Christ is our center, community is our context, engaging culture our calling.

Here's my question. How do we call people to a simple life, when there are so many options?

It seems that our consumer culture has influenced people to believe they are consumers at the core of their being. So just as they pick all their options at Starbucks or with their phone company, they pick and chose all their faith options. I'll be with this group on Sunday, another on Tuesday and even something else Saturday. There really is no commitment to any one community of faith. It seems to be a life of test-driving or dating. I'm trying to determine if this is healthy or kind of sick.

Out of the Fog

2005-08-14T10:22:00.000-06:00

I've been in a fog for a while. I feel like I'm pulling out. Things are becoming more clear. These times are disruptive for me. I don't like being hard or unable to laugh. That's the worst about being in this kind of fog.

I know that I give the best gifts I have to offer to people when I am clear and relaxed. And when I forget about who I've been made to be, that's when the fog creates some sort of barrier to real life.

I am starting to remember today, this morning remembered who I am. And the one who made me. I remembered.

The fog lifts a little.

Muddled

2005-08-11T09:59:00.000-06:00

I'm muddled today. My options; be frustrated or embrace the fact that I can't figure it all out. I don't know if I want to embrace anything right now, but I don't like living in frustration. I'd rather be more free with my life and relaxed. So I guess I'll do what I can to embrace unknowing. We'll see what happens today.

A Great Blue Heron

2005-08-10T10:42:00.001-06:00